Must Love (Portuguese Water) Dogs

The Barry Bunch

Guess what America? Your prayers have been answered. No, your 401k hasn't suddenly re-surged and your home is still worthless, but the Obama's have finally decided on the newest, furriest member of the first family: a rescue Portuguese Water Dog.

Wooohooo!

"Temperamentally they're supposed to be pretty good...it's not small, but it's not a huge dog. And the folks that we know who own them have raved about them. So that's where we're leaning."

In other words, it's not a girly dog, won't shed all over the place, and Ted Kennedy just loves them.

Sounds perfect to First Lady Michelle Obama. Except for one thing.

"Oh, the names are really bad. I don't even want to mention it, because there are names floating around and they're bad. I think, Frank was one of them. Frank! Moose was another one of them. Moose. I said, well, what if the dog isn't a moose?"

Then you won't have to worry about Sarah Palin aerial hunting it while it frolics unsuspectingly on the White House lawn, now will you?

Barack Obama: "A Mutt Like Me"

What Furry Friend Will The Obama's Choose?

Two wars, an economic crisis, rising unemployment, terrorism, the list of problems facing America goes on and on.

Even though Barack Obama is not officially sworn in as President until January 20, he decided to go ahead and start acting presidential a little earlier, piecing together his cabinet and assembling the best minds to tackle the pressing economic crisis.

Bush, who in case you forgot, is still in charge, said he was "cool with Obama helpin' and all" and didn't feel like he was being "one-upped by the lanky black dude."

Besides, Bush, added, "I'm glad someone wants to deal with this s**t, cause I sure as hell don't wanna do it...Now where the devil did I put my fishing rod?"

But even with the weight of the world on his shoulders, the ever-cool Obama did have time for some lighter moments during his press conference on Friday, the first since his historic win on Tuesday night.

And as for the big question on everyone's lips: What kind of puppy will the Obama's take to the White House?

"We have two criteria that have to be reconciled. One is that Malia is allergic, so it has to be hypoallergenic...On the other hand, our preference would be to get a shelter dog, but, obviously, a lot of shelter dogs are mutts like me. So, whether we're going to be able to balance those two things I think is a pressing issue on the Obama household."

A presidential mutt, eh? Well, it's worth a try, I guess. After all, our last president was a pure bred and I don't think I need to remind you how well that worked out for us.