It's All About The "Bo!"

Woooohooo!!! America is very excited. And not because some bad-ass Navy Seals snipers took out three pirates with exactly three bullet shots to the head in a daring rescue of hostage U.S. Captain Richard Phillips after a five-day standoff. Snooze.

But because the first family finally welcomed their first pet, a 6-month-old Portuguese water dog--and boy is he cuuuuute!

The Obama girls have decided to name the new dog Bo because their cousins have a cat named Bo and because first lady Michelle Obama's father was nicknamed Diddley. So, instead of being stuck with some god-awful name Michelle can't stand like "Frank" or "Moose," the first pup will be called "Bo" Diddley, after the original R&B rock 'n roller. Clever girls, Sasha and Malia!

The black and white pup was given to the Obama girls as a gift from Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, D-Mass., who owns several Portuguese water dogs himself and knows the joy these beautiful four-legged creatures bring to distinguished families of wealth and taste.

However, because Bo came from a Kennedy and not from a shelter as promised, the Obamas will make a donation to the D.C. Humane Society.

Oh yeah, like that makes up for LYING to the American people.

Bo Diddley Obama, At Your Service

Must Love (Portuguese Water) Dogs

The Barry Bunch

Guess what America? Your prayers have been answered. No, your 401k hasn't suddenly re-surged and your home is still worthless, but the Obama's have finally decided on the newest, furriest member of the first family: a rescue Portuguese Water Dog.

Wooohooo!

"Temperamentally they're supposed to be pretty good...it's not small, but it's not a huge dog. And the folks that we know who own them have raved about them. So that's where we're leaning."

In other words, it's not a girly dog, won't shed all over the place, and Ted Kennedy just loves them.

Sounds perfect to First Lady Michelle Obama. Except for one thing.

"Oh, the names are really bad. I don't even want to mention it, because there are names floating around and they're bad. I think, Frank was one of them. Frank! Moose was another one of them. Moose. I said, well, what if the dog isn't a moose?"

Then you won't have to worry about Sarah Palin aerial hunting it while it frolics unsuspectingly on the White House lawn, now will you?