The Bush Admin's Brilliant Solution To Mideast Crisis: Let Obama Deal With It!

"I Will Dial Numbers With All My Might"

With a mounting crisis in Gaza and less than three weeks in office, still?-president George W. Bush continued to awe and inspire America and the world with his unique brand of pragmatism and foresight.

Aides to President Bush insisted the president was working hard to achieve a "durable and sustainable" cease-fire (wink, wink), which is really just government slang for doing as little as possible until he can officially hand this whole mess over to that cool, colored dude with the weird sounding name. Seems like a nice enough fellow.

Meanwhile, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice flexed her dazzling diplomatic muscles, laughing off growing criticism that a more direct approach in diffusing the latest Israeli-Palestinian flare up was necessary, while vowing to continue waging her furious telephone diplomacy until a truce was arranged...or her time expired. Whatever comes first.

Why on Earth would the Sec. of State actually travel to the troubled region when she can just as easily run around her office here in Washington, frantically making phone calls to secure a truce Hamas will respect. And is durable and sustainable. And takes place as soon as possible.

Preferably in under 18 days, please.

Hey, Since When Are Men More Qualified To Be Secretaries Than Women?

So it appears the weirdly uncomfortable Obama-Clinton-Richardson trio from the primaries has once again reared its ugly head.

It all started when Gov. Richardson spit on Hillary (and Bill's!) faces by endorsing that nightmarish fairy tale Barack Obama for President, even though the Clinton's basically put his ass on the map by giving him that plum Secretary of Energy gig back in the good days when Bill and Hilly still ran the show.

And now the treacherous Gov. Richardson has decided to throw a wrench in Hillary's plans once again, meeting with Obama over a possible Secretary of State position, the position she rightfully deserved. Bastard!

I mean can you believe the nerve of that man? Waltzing into Sec of State contention, like some oppressed minority trying to "make history" as the first Hispanic to hold such a high-ranking cabinet post. Please.

Let's get one thing straight here, Mr. Richardson. There is only one person left who can truly speak to the plight of the nation's last real struggling minority--female warrior Hillary Rodham Clinton!

Saluting Shattered Glass Ceilings Everywhere

Keep Friends Close And Enemies Closer

Aw, Hill, He'll Make It Up To You!

Is Barack Obama really about to tempt fate and commit the ultimate act of self-sabotage by appointing arch rival and estrogen-charged thorn-in-his-side Hillary Rodham Clinton as his trusted Secretary of State?

No one knows for sure. But the rumors are swirling.

And with 31 of the 47 people already named to transition or staff posts having ties to the Clinton administration, Obama figures why not complete his ultimate "Team of Rivals" by throwing the former first lady some Sec. of State love.

She'll be the first to tell you that she's certainly earned it.

I guess when Obama said he wanted to "bury the hatchet" with HRC after elections, he really meant give her a sharp, shiny new hatchet, put a big bulls-eye on his back, and in true Obama style, continue to hope for the best.

"Change She Now Believes In"