Leading Shakespearean scholar and philosopher of Facebook, Dr. Sarah Louise Palin is very confused about what the dickens is going on over in Liberia, err, Latvia, wait, or was it Libya (she can never remember!), and not just because she's a stupid snowbilly grifter whose IQ is the same number as the average winter temperature in Wasilla.
Heavens no!
It is simply because during his latest failed attempt to do anything, Barack Hussein Obama refused to say exactly what the U.S. of A is even doing in this weird Muslim country she's never heard of. Is it a war, an intervention, or as Sarah suspects, some kind of squirmish, which the rest of us can only assume is either a battle to the death between two Earth worms, or a kind of practice-war, a squimmage, of sorts.
All of which Sarah finds so disconcerting that she just had to immediately go on her favoritest Fox News to "refudiate" all the terrible things Barack Obama did or did not say during his God-awful, hoity-toity, nuance-filled, elitist, non-war declaring, pussy address to America.
Wait, what's this we hear? Sarah did start to feel some of that hopey-changey hogwash NObama is always squawking 'n squeaking about during that magical moment when he decided to toss in some ridiculous "North Star" metaphor in his speech.
Turns out, this is the exact sort of idiocy Sarah Palin likes.
"The Great North Star, with its abiding light o'er land and sea. A beacon bright!" she squeals in delight, before going off on some weird tangent about the North Star bein' Alaskan's GPS system and usin' it as a guide to stay focused on what really matters. (Making Mount McKinley's of money?)
Umm, yeah. Not only does Obama have a brand spanking new squirmish on his hands, he's also starting to talk like Sarah Palin's even more special needs alter ego, Lou Sarah.
OMG, we're all sqruewed!
And to think, I always thought squirmish was the sound of some silly squank stomping on the English language!
1 comment:
Great blog post, but I do take issue with your line about Palin's IQ being the same as the average winter temperature in Wasilla.
I don't think IQ scores can be negative.
Post a Comment