Thursday, September 25, 2008

McCain Returns To Washington Just In Time To Ruin Everything

Everything was going smoothly. Democrats and Republicans managed to cast aside their partisan differences long enough to craft a $700 billion dollar bailout plan to rescue the country from certain economic ruin. After hours of intense debate and scrutiny, lawmakers were finally on the verge of a breakthrough.

Disaster, it seemed, would be avoided.

But then in an instant everything changed. McCain went temporarily insane and decided it would be a good idea to "suspend his campaign" in a wholesome attempt to put politics aside and lead the nation through its current economic crisis.

Sen. McCain then boldly marched back into Washington just long enough to campaign about not-campaigning, poison the atmosphere with petty presidential politics, and swiftly crush all hopes of reaching any type of productive, bipartisan agreement.

Damn right he is ready to be President!

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