This Is One Bizarre Love Triangle We Could've Done Without

Umm, yeah, this is gonna be awkward. So I'm just gonna go ahead and save you the suspense: It's his kid.

You already know pretty boy family man John Edwards was running around screwing some broad--er make that his mistress--while he ran for president of the world and his wife battled cancer. He's just that kind of guy. So is it really that crazy to think that after endless romps in the sack, one of his li'l guys managed to squiggle in and implant itself in Rielle's fertile womb?

Who knows. Maybe Rielle is sluttier than we thought and goes around banging more than rich, smug politicians from one of the Carolinas.

I, for one, am not going to pretend to be an expert on the sexual exploits of a certain Rielle Hunter, aka Lisa Jo Druck, Lisa Hunter, Lisa Jo Hunter, Rielle Jaya James Druck. All I know is her and Johnny were going at it for quite some time when Miss Hunter suddenly found herself preggers with an anonymous love child, sworn to secrecy and whisked away to sunny California.

Either way this ends, I have a feeling wifey Elizabeth isn't going to be pleased. And something tells me John Edwards' presidential aspirations aren't getting any brighter. Not that they were so hot before this little faux pas.

I don't know. Something about this southern gentleman and his $400 dollar hair cuts just never really felt right. Almost as if it were too good to be true.

Hillary Clinton's Very Own "Rahmbo"

Ooooh, could there be something going on between Obama's former nemesis Hillary Rodham Clinton and his newly appointed White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel?

Conventional wisdom says no, but some bored reporters are apparently saying otherwise. Slow news day or steamy secret love affair?

The buzz started when Clinton, who met with President Bush to discuss the economic stimulus package on Tuesday, agreed to hold a conference call with reporters.

Amid the usual boring questions about Joe Lieberman's future and her thoughts on being a Senator during an Obama administration, the topic turned to juicier subjects like Rahm Emanuel, who also happened to be a staffer in hubby Bill Clinton's White House.

Clinton answered the first question, "Will Rahm Emanuel as chief of staff be good for New York’s interest?" with some dull non-controversial response about how Obama understands the needs of big cities and blah blah blah.

Nothing sensational here.

So the reporter probed a little further, "Do you think that Rahm's going to be accessible to New Yorkers?"

"Rahm Emanuel?" Clinton asked with a smile in her voice. "He's going to be accessible to me."

Which could only mean one thing.

Sex kitten Hillary Rodham Clinton isn't getting her kicks from ol' hubby Bill and has instead turned to her personal "Rahmbo," sexy stud muffin Rahm Emanuel to satiate her womanly desires.

And judging from the picture, I think we have a pretty good idea why.

I mean, can you really blame the woman?

Congressman, Sex Scandals, And Florida, Oh My!

Rep. Tim Mahoney And The Woman/Thing He Was Banging

Sex scandals do not discriminate. That's right. As long as you happen to be a politician from the state of Florida, you are fair game. I don't know what it is, either. Maybe it's the hot, steamy weather, round juicy oranges, or disproportionate number of old people that revs up one's sexual appetite.

Whatever the culprit, one thing is for certain: If you are a politician representing the Sunshine State, chances are your overactive libido will eventually be your downfall.

For the second consecutive election year, West Palm Beach--the sex-scandal capital of America--titillates the good citizens of this country with a sordid story of a fallen congressman.

First, it was Republican Congressman Mark Foley, who in 2006, honored his oath of elected office by soliciting sex (and not just any sex, but gay sex) from teenage boys working as congressional pages.

After Foley's disgraceful exit and subsequent coming out of the closet, the congressional seat was basically open for the taking to anyone with a pulse and the ability to control their homosexual/pedophile urges.

Enter Florida Democrat Tim Mahoney, whose only real challenge after the Foley debacle, was to basically keep it in his pants. But alas, that proved to be too much to ask of the man.

The same man who waltzed into office using campaign ads featuring a picture of him with his wife, Terry, and the line, "Restoring America's Values Begins at Home."

A promise he kept by giving a campaign job and $121,000 in hush money to the mistress he was so honorably banging while working hard to bring dignity and morality back to the sex-ravaged district.