Wednesday, October 26, 2011

The Show May Be Over, But Traitor Joe's Always Open For Business (If That Business Is Screwing Over Democrats)


There is nothing, I repeat, nothing Sen. Joe Lieberman enjoys more than crushing hopes and destroying dreams. Except maybe the occasional chance to kick a whimpering, defenseless puppy down the street or really stick it to Democrats, ya know, the party he joined in 1970 and represented as a vice presidential candidate in 2000, before deciding eh, why not go against everything I've ever stood for my entire life in some desperate, pathetic attempt to remain relevant, and retain my smooth, surprisingly large, perfectly manicured grip on power?

**Sigh** Oh, that Joe!

Well, according to the liberal rag/commie manifesto The New York Times, Benedict Lieberman has been taking meetings with the two main Republican primary challengers: ball bustin' World Wrestling Entertainment executive Linda McMahon who apparently didn't think $50 million was enough to waste on a losing campaign the first time around, and former Rep. Chris Shays, another old, endlessly frustrating New England moderate conservative who also loves beautiful war but at least understands which political party he belongs to. Which is more than we can say for ol' Joe!

On the bright side, at least Democrats don't have to worry that Joe will wake up with an actual conscious and endorse one of them (heavens forbid!), which would be probably be as helpful as a bite from a syphilitic hyena.
In the meantime, some Connecticut Democrats who are eyeing the party's nomination for his seat are not particularly interested in getting Mr. Lieberman's support. They seem wary of associating politically with a man who went from being the Democratic vice-presidential candidate in 2000 to backing Senator John McCain, Republican of Arizona, over Barack Obama in the 2008 presidential race.
Susan Bysiewicz, a former Connecticut secretary of state who is seeking the Democratic nomination for Senate, noted in an interview that Mr. Lieberman was unpopular with rank-and-file Democrats.
"Senator Lieberman's endorsement would not be helpful," she said, adding that she believed he was more closely identified with the Republicans these days.
Representative Christopher S. Murphy, a three-term Democrat who is also running for Mr. Lieberman's seat, said, "I'm not sure his support is relevant."
Hush it Murphy! You fool, you'll ruin everything!  If Lieberman finds out that endorsing a Democrat would be the quickest, most sure-fire way to screw over a Democrat, then that is just what he'll do.

And what more fitting way to bid adieu to our favorite Jewish Benedict Arnold than with a little Broadway ditty?
Go, go, go Joseph you know what they say (you're an asshole?)
Hang on now Joseph you'll make it some day (use those big, firm hands!)
Sha la la Joseph you're doing fine (for a loser pariah no one likes!)
You and your dreamcoat ahead of your time (well, technically it's a turncoat)

Go, go, go Joseph you know what they say (it's actually probably better if you don't)
Hang on now Joseph you'll make it some day (and by "it" we totally mean money!)
Sha la la Joseph you're doing fine (Hadassah still loves you!)
You and your dreamcoat ahead of your time (more like nightmarecoat for everyone else!)

Oh, fuck it, just...
Go, go, go, go
Go, go, go, go
Go, go, go, go
Go, go, go, go
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
[image via AP]

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