The Comically Screwed State Of Politics, In Small, Easy-To-Swallow Bites.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Let The Games Begin!
Things are not looking so hot for John McCain. On the eve of the final presidential debate between the two candidates, smooth-talking hipster Barry Obama has opened up a whopping 14 point lead over that other candidate of change, Johnny "My Friends" McCain.
There is no doubt that for both candidates, tonight's final debate looms large. But for John McCain, who is looking to narrow the increasingly widening gap between himself and Obama, the stakes are even higher. Which does not bode too well for old Johnny. Unfortunately for the GOP maverick, tonight's debate focus is on domestic issues, including the current economic crisis engulfing the nation. Which we all know is not exactly McCain's strong suit.
But do not despair, my friends! One thing John does know how to do is improvise.
We are confident that Johnny will find some way to talk about the issues he does know a thing or two about, like how Barack Obama hates America, loves to pal around with terrorists, and desperately wants to teach sex-education to Kindergarteners.
And if all else fails, McCain does have a few crowd-pleasing tricks up his sleeve, like his stunning power-point presentation on how to survive five years in a Vietnamese prison.
Now losing your home doesn't seem so bad after all, does it?