Saturday, August 22, 2009

Will The Red Window Help Elizabeth Edwards Shut The Door On The Nightmare That Is Her Life?

While her whole life goes to hell because of her scumsucking hubby John, his homewrecking whore of an ex-girlfriend Rielle Hunter and the mysterious love child that may or may not be part Edwards, poor old Elizabeth Edwards figured what better way to distract herself from the unrelenting media circus that is her life than by opening a new furniture store, Red Window, in Chapel Hill, North Carolina?

Yes, Mrs. Elizabeth Edwards is no longer just the forgotten wife of a onetime presidential candidate with a swank $400 haircut, but is now also a small business owner proudly offering "North Carolina furnishings at wholesale prices."

Calling the store a family endeavor, Elizabeth said the new business venture is an idea dating back to her childhood when her mother managed a charity store in Japan called The Red Door.

Of course, being a family establishment and all, on hand for the opening was dutiful husband John and their 11-year-old daughter Emma Claire. Sadly, neither Rielle nor the pint-sized culmination of their illicit love affair were there to celebrate the joyous occasion. Maybe the Two-Year Anniversary!

Neither John nor Elizabeth would address the nasty rumors swirling around about baby daddies and blonde former lovers or any of that made-up media nonsense.

"Tabloid news is tabloid news," Elizabeth said. "We just have a family to run and now a business to run as well, so we just keep our eye on that ball and try to ignore what supermarket tabloids have to say."

Good plan Liz! But perhaps hubby John has something to say on his future plans aside from "doing the things I need to do with my family, helping Elizabeth, support what she's doing here."

Yeah buddy, cause anyone's buying that. But he does try to help out where he can.

"I do more moving furniture than anything else," John said. "This is Elizabeth's deal, but everybody in the family is trying to help support her."

In all fairness, he did get plenty of practice helping his former lady friend Rielle Hunter and her fatherless baby move into a house close to the Edwards' waterfront home in Wilmington. That's just the kind of guy he is.

A real southern gentleman that John!

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