Meet Michael Steele, New Boss Of Republicans
In case anyone actually cares, the Republicans have decided to drop the whole Klansman act and instead grudgingly join the rest of the 21st century in all its beautiful non-segregated glory.
It only took the maximum six ballots for former Maryland Lt. Gov. Michael Steele to become the first ever African-American chairman of the Republican National Committee, after narrowly defeating his lone remaining challenger, Katon Dawson, one of the dwindling few true GOP patriots who still play golf at a whites-only country club.
Republican committee members weren't happy about it but figured it was better to just go ahead and let the colored man win, than cause a big stink for picking their real choices, white supremacist Katon Dawson or the just-as-lovely Chip Saltsman, whose brainchild "Barack the Magic Negro" delighted us for hours.
So congratulations Mr. Steele. We're even willing to overlook the fact that Mike Tyson used to be your brother-in-law.
And bravo to the Republican Party for also making history. We're happy to have you, even if it is oh, a couple decades late.