Sarah Palin's Farewell Kiss To The Upper 1

What better way for America's favorite former beauty queen governor Sarah Palin to kick off her final weekend in office than a picnic tour across the great and wondrous state of Alaska?

But this isn't your average annual fun-filled Wasilla weenie-roast and root beer float bonanza. It is the last weekend in the history of Man that Sarah "Barracuda" Palin will serve the good people of Alaska as its cheerful mascot and fearless guardian against Russia before turning over the reigns to somebody whose family won't be harassed by the evil, arugula-eating media elitists.

Come Sunday, Miss Palin will bid farewell to the magical place that took a feisty high school point guard and turned her into the most popular governor in America and an old man's last-ditch effort for White House glory.

But don't worry Sarah's journey into America's heart isn't over yet. Sure her popularity isn't exactly what it used to be (darn ethics complaints!), she has legal bills galore (pathetic bloggers and libelous journalists!), and is patriotically ditching out on the remaining year-and-a-half of her term (no lame ducks here!), but you betcha she'll continue fighting for Alaska and freedom with all her lipstick-wearing-pitbull, hockey mom might.

She just needs a little time away from Alaska and politics to effect real change for America. Maybe refill the ol' coffers too. But one thing's for sure, she'll "Never apologize for being American." Or an idiot either.