Hey Kids, It's Comedy Hour With Barney And Rush!

Aww, snap! Someone just got served! Big bad Barney Frank doesn't like being interrupted. And he certainly doesn't like having his town hall discussion disrupted so that some seemingly normal looking woman who's actually bat crazy can ask him pressing, substantive health care reform questions like, "Why are you supporting this Nazi policy?" while holding up a tasteful Obama equals Hitler sign.

Which is precisely why Barry very calmly answers this young gal's query by calling her approach, "vile, contemptible nonsense" and responding with his own question, "On what planet do you spend most of your time?"

He then decides not to humor this idiot lady with a legitimate answer because "Trying to have a conversation with you would be like arguing with a dining room table." And being the reasonable person that he is, Barney really doesn't see any point in trying to talk sense into an inanimate object with racist tendencies. Fair enough.

But not everyone thinks this dining room table got a fair shake from old Barney.

Sure, Rush Limbaugh thinks "it's fabulous and fantastic, and hilarious that a woman shows up at a Barney Frank town hall meeting with an Obama-as-Hitler poster and this Nazi stuff, in his district. I mean, this is unreal."

"But the killer for me was, here's Barney Frank saying, 'What planet do you live on?' to this woman. Isn't it an established fact that Barney Frank himself spends of his time living around Uranus?" HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Get it?? No, not because he's Jewish but because he's a GAY (gasp!). LOL! Hilarious.

And to think it only took Rushy three scrapped drafts, 200 revisions, a trough of dark roast coffee, twenty cans of Red Bull, five large pizzas, two double bacon cheeseburgers, 10 cigars, and three bottles of his usual hydrocodone-oxycodone cocktail to come up with it!

Looks like it's SHOWTIME at the Apollo for someone...

Health Care Protesters Once Again Turn Peaceful Town Hall Into Nazi Rally

OMG. This is it! The big kahuna you've been waiting for to prove once and for all the town hall crazies are nothing more than a bunch of psycho, black-and-Jew hating kooks who run around terrorizing peaceful public discussions by basically acting like a bunch of wild-eyed maniacs whenever said peaceful public discussions take place.

Employing their usual guerrilla tactics of shrieking, screaming, and grunting nonsense about how Obama's skin color is ruining America's health care, these true Americans will not lay silent while the U.S. turns into Nazi Germany because anything they don't agree with automatically becomes a twisted offshoot of the third Reich.

At a town hall in Las Vegas an Israeli man is praising Israel's national health care system because it takes care of its soldiers etc etc, when he is rudely interrupted by this insane hell woman who starts shrieking "Heil Hitler!" at him because that's what crazy people do when they really disagree with something they don't remotely understand but still want their face on the teevee.

So this freak lady continues to pound this poor man with "Heil Hitler!" until he finally snaps and angrily exclaims, "Did you hear this? She say to a Jew, 'Heil Hitler'! Hear? I'm a Jew! You're telling me, 'Heil Hitler'? Shame of you!"

And the evil woman proceeds to cackle wildly and mock him for not even knowing how to speak English good and being positively gay for Obama and acting like a little crybaby just because America's perfect health care system bankrupted him and ruined his life and basically turned him into a senior SS officer.

Score one for the crazies!

All Bark, No Bite? Obama's Presence Enough To Muzzle Town Hall Crazies

Death squad commander-in-chief Barack Obama cares about health care SO much, he's even willing to take on crazed, pitchfork-wielding mobs just to prove to the American people that, contrary to what wise scholars like Sarah Palin say, universal health care does not spell an automatic death sentence for Gramps or baby Trig.

Dear leader Barry Obama was ready to brave whatever gun-toting nutjob or shrieking loon who dared disrupt his New Hampshire town hall with their "scare tactics" like threatening old, frail legislators with a beat-down and bringing loaded guns to the debate. Not to mention all that noise!

So Obama's all juiced to throw down against the town hall crazies asking them, no, begging them to come forward, lower their voice to an audible, not deafening level, and finally ask the evil O man why exactly ObamaCare has them so beside themselves.

But noooo. In the presence of the main menace himself, the loudmouth nut brigade suddenly lost its voice, meaning this town hall was utterly dull, free of violence and a terrible waste of time.

"For all the scare tactics out there, what is truly scary is if we do nothing...For all the chatter and the yelling and the shouting and the noise, what you need to know is this: if you do have health insurance, we will make sure that no insurance company or government bureaucrat gets between you and the care you need." Or systematically murders you.

Besides, as long as they have a good product and can sustain themselves, private insurers should have no problem competing with the dumpy government plan.

"They do it all the time," Obama explained. "UPS and FedEx are doing just fine...It's the Post Office that's always having problems."

You hear that people? It's all about choices! Since the government is evil and turns everything it touches into a hellish bureaucratic nightmare, feel free to pay more for the piece of mind that comes with having a respectable private company like FedEx and UPS lose your valuables.

Or your life, whatever the case may be.

Disgruntled Conservatives Turn Their Teabaggin' Wrath To ObamaCare

The Republicans are not happy with that ambitious Obama or his un-American plan to turn the nation's health care system into a government sanctioned holocaust of the old and unborn. In fact, they are steaming mad! So mad that they are willing to do anything, anything, to stop Comrade Barry's deviant quest to socialize medicine and ruin America, including saying whatever crazy sh*t they think will freak the public out most.

Let's call it the GOP strategy of desperation and lies. They use it from time to time, whenever they find themselves at the mercy of an uppity commander-in-chief with legislative majority and . They've tried everything: secret Muslim terrorist, Kenyan-born socialist, arugula-eating elitist, but nothing seems to stick on this guy! What is a GOPer to do to get America to hop off the Barry bandwagon?

It starts with conservative whispers about how Obama's health reform is the first step toward a totalitarian dystopia in which the government kills off the old and unfit. Next convince the wingnut base that brought us those delightful tea parties that this nightmare vision where doctors and government conspire to kill Grandma and Grandpa for fun will soon be reality, if psycho Barry gets his way.

The seeds will then be sown for revolts and uprisings at town hall meetings across the country, where unhinged protesters can disrupt constructive debate on health care reform by burning effigies and spewing hysterical nonsense against Emperor Obama's doomsday health care plan to murder the elderly and infirm.

I guess you just have to tip your hat to the Republicans for their brilliant strategy of shrieking like madmen whether anyone's listening or not. It's the next best thing to being right!

Blah, Blah Socialism!