Friday, June 19, 2009

Obama Takes Break From Murdering Flies To Make Gays Feel Like Real Citizens



Liberal hippie Barack Obama has promised to do a lot of things, namely fix the economy, healthcare, Iraq, Afghanistan, and basically everything else Georgey managed to screw up completely. He also promised the gays he'd try to help make them first-class citizens, but excuuuuse him if his plate's been a little full!

So, with the pace of a sloth dipped in molasses, President Barack Obama signed a memorandum extending some federal benefits to same-sex partners of federal workers. Of course, the measure doesn't cover healthcare and retirement benefits, two of the things no one ever thinks about when they think about "employment benefits." Perhaps they'll get a discount on Nationals tickets or Lincoln Memorial tours instead?

As he signed the historic legislation into law, Obama said, "Extending equal benefits to the same-sex partners of Federal employees is the right thing to do," although he did note that by law, the government cannot grant gay couples the same range of benefits afforded to heterosexual couples. Sorry, gays, better luck next time.

Obama also reiterated his opposition to the Defense of Marriage Act, saying, "It's discriminatory, it interferes with States' rights, and it's time we overturned it."

But if you'll excuse him, he has a few flies to kill first.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

wow you sure are so accepting of people and their differences...NOT!!!! HOW CAN YOU BE SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON?!?!?!? PRESIDENT OBAMA HAS DONE SO MUCH OF A BETTER JOB THAN THAT IDIOT BUSH EVER DID!!!! EIGHT YEARS OF THE WORST PRESIDENT EVER! WOW THATS A GREAT THING FOR A PRESIDENT TO DO WE SHOULD JUST MAKE BUSH KING FOREVER YEAH WHY NOT THAT MAKES SENSE AGAIN NOT!!! AND GAYS ARE REAL CITIZENS!!!! OH YEAH, SO YOU CRITICIZE OBAMA FOR SWATTING A FLY AND THEN YOU CRITICIZE HIM AGAIN FOR NOT NUKING IRAN!!! R U RETARDED??? HMM LETS THINK...YES!!! WHY DONT YOU JUST GO AND DIE IN A HOLE WITH ALL OF YOUR GUN TOTING TRIGGER HAPPY TRUCKER HAT WEARING HUNTING MOTORCYCLE RIDING GOD BLESS AMERICA SINGING VINYL CARPET WALKING LIVING IN TRAILER PARK REDNECK FRIENDS CUZ THATS ALL THAT YOU ARE!!!

imissamerica said...

Wow. You sure are angry! But alas, there's no reason for it. Apparently the concept of sarcasm escapes you. That's ok. We're accepting of everyone here, even morons.